A Gift For Helen
by dreamer one
Summary: John believes he has the cure for Helen’s loneliness, but he needs Tesla’s help.
1. Chapter 1

A GIFT FOR HELEN

Summary: John believes he has the cure for Helen's loneliness, but he needs Tesla's help.

Chapter 1: Love or Hubris

Nikola Tesla sat sullenly at the heavy mahogany desk he'd somehow salvaged from his previous existence. Around that antique piece of furniture, he'd built a close approximation of a state of the art genetics lab. Dark, dreary, but definitely functional, the workings of his brilliant but twisted mind found life in this room. It was his newest hideaway, his "go to ground", or at least it had been.

Yes, all of that was in the past. He'd been certain no one would find him here. Built as it was under an obscure pyramid in the far reaches of the Egyptian desert, he'd planned to remain anonymous until his newest designs for the future of humanity were ready to debut. Even the great Helen Magnus would be unable to find him here, if indeed she ever wished to find him. Secretly, he wished she would _want_ to find him. But, no, her heart had always been given to the other.

Ah… the other… that sorry excuse for a scientist… that Druitt! The bane of his existence he was! In one lifetime the man had stolen Helen's heart away from him and broken it to pieces in the next. And now… well now that same man, the personification of the devil himself wanted another bite of the apple. How dare he? Worse yet, to ask for his help was incomprehensible.

Nikola ceased his inner rant long enough to consider another permutation of reality. It was far-fetched, but possible he supposed. Perhaps his old nemesis truly loved Helen. Perhaps, in an uncharacteristic bout of selflessness, he'd decided to offer her what could be her only chance at true and lasting happiness. Though Nikola would prefer to believe that chance lay with him, Druitt could be right. He was, after all, the one she had chosen so very long ago.

His hackles bristled at the thought. Worse yet, he could feel the homicidal vampire aspects of his physiology rise to the occasion, his fingers literally itching in their desire to transform. Yet something held those baser instincts in check. In his heart of hearts he knew what had to be done. John had asked for his help. As her friend, a man who loved her in his own right, Nikola sensed this might be what Helen needed. And as the one who loved her from afar, he had to give her another chance at happiness.

But if Druitt thought he wouldn't be watching…

As if on cue, the air throughout the laboratory rushed at him; his skin tingled with the charge of static electricity. Druitt had returned. His timing, as always, was impeccable. His bearing, once again as always, was insufferable.

"Will you help me?" John Druitt demanded, seemingly unfazed by his recent bout of teleportation.

"You didn't give me a great deal of time to consider the proposition," Nikola countered obstinately.

"I gave you more than you should need, old man," John said. "If you care for Helen as you have so long implied, you've had more than enough time."

Nikola stood up slowly, stretching his sinewy form as though he had all the time in the world. He thoroughly enjoyed toying with Druitt. They were a match; even driven to the edge, John Druitt could do little to seriously hurt him and he knew it. With that thought in mind Tesla pressed his advantage, careful to observe every last twitch of discomfort in his old rival's visage. Ever so slowly, the erstwhile vampire walked across the room towards John, stopping to caress this implement and the other, staring meaningfully into his own reflection in the glassware.

"Well?'

"Don't be so impatient," Tesla said. "After all these years, you'd think we would have learned more of the social graces. Come, have a cup of tea…"

"I will damned well wring your bloodthirsty, pathetic little neck," Druitt sputtered.  
"Stop playing with me, Tesla."

"Alright, my murderous companion in crime," Nikola spat, "I'll get on with it then. Still I'd think you'd treat me with a bit more respect, seeing as you come begging for my assistance." Nikola postured, stretching his back and cracking his neck as he did so. "Now you would have me create a new and improved John Druitt, would you not?"

John's face hardened. He pulled himself up to his full imposing height and slowly, deliberately moved to stand directly in front of his shorter, wiry, less than cowed partner.

"You are quite aware of what I am asking you to do," John hissed menacingly. "Can you do it or not?"

Tesla sputtered in annoyance.

"Of course I can make _a copy_," he said indignantly. "Do you think me an incompetent government lackey? Cloning is simple; one needs only the stomach for it. It's the fine points that take a bit more finesse, my friend."

"Such as…?"

"Such as … how to take the ripper out of the rogue shall we say," Tesla responded. "After all, you tell me your intent is to offer Helen a gift, not murder her."

"Watch your tongue," John cautioned flatly, his voice a fine veil for his distaste of the present situation. "I've come to you for assistance, not insult. Do you not think I know exactly what and who I have become? I promised to care for Helen, to make her happy and all I've done is bring her pain. I regret that more than you will ever imagine. And I want to make it up to her. If you can't or won't help me, just say so and I'll be gone."

Tesla stared at the man he'd known for so many eventful years. He was right; he'd changed dramatically from the young upstart researcher he'd known at University. That bloke had been polished, respectable and a bit innocent. All of that and he'd stolen the prize right from under Nikola's nose. And that nose was still severely out of joint.

"What makes you think she'd want the new and improved you?" Tesla queried.

"What gives you the audacity to suggest she wouldn't?"

"Touché," Nikola replied. "You were her choice, were you not, old boy? Who am I to argue with Helen's choice of a lover?"

"Who, indeed?" John agreed. "Helen made her choice. I simply want to give her the opportunity to make it again, free of the source blood's curse. Once more I ask, can you?

"Will you?"

"Create a clone with your original characteristics, with your memories of Helen and all she's been through, but no personal knowledge or experience of your murderous past… I'm not sure I can. Moreover, I'm not certain I want to. She's seen enough John, how do you think this would help her?"

"I could have made her happy, Nikola," John insisted. "I want one more chance."

Tesla began to pace, shaking his head as he did so.

"Assuming I am successful, what is to say you will not kill this creation of mine in a jealous fit of rage?"

"Only my word," he replied sadly, "something which understandably means little to anyone at this point. Once Helen has accepted my replacement, I intend to vanish permanently." John hung his head for a moment and then fixed Tesla was an unabashed gaze. "Do it for Helen."

He had him. Tesla thought he'd lost the sensitive, self effacing part of his nature long ago, but sure enough Helen was his soft spot. John was right, she was painfully alone and condemned to a long, solitary life. Immortality was a burden. Nikola knew that more than most. He understood Helen's loneliness. Perhaps, this wasn't such a bad idea.

"Why now?"

"Ashley's gone," John stated as a matter of fact. "Our daughter gave Helen a reason to continue, a balm for her soul, the love of a child. I can't give that back to her. But I can do this. In a way, it could be a new start for both of us. If it fails, it fails, but I'll have tried one last time to make Helen happy.

"I thought wiping out the Cabal would help," he snorted. "Oh, it gave me satisfaction … but none of that gave Helen any true joy. Even the goodness of wringing the life from Dana Whitcomb, delicious at it was at the moment, did nothing for me or Helen, not in the way I'd hoped. Yes, I have my revenge, but for Helen, I want more. Then I can take my leave.

"Help me, Nikola."

Tesla nodded silently. It would be done.

TBC

OoOoOo

A/N: Never say never. I promised myself and you no ongoing sagas for Sanctuary as I just couldn't see it. This is the outcome of my thinking about how life must be extremely lonely for Magnus with no one who could truly understand her, partner with her.

Not sure John's idea would be the way to go, but stay tuned and see what Helen has to say.

Reviews are much appreciated. Thoughts, suggestions, corrections based on the canon of the show also welcome.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Reaction

It was a day of relative calm at the Sanctuary in Old City. With no emergencies, no escapes of vicious Abnormals, no medical crises, no need for hand holding and no monsters to chase, Helen had a rare few moments to herself.

In a way she dreaded these times. Where before she'd greedily anticipated moments like this, since Ashley's death, it wasn't the same. After all, there was no way quiet moments could become family time now, was there? There was no daughter to call for a quick lunch, a shopping trip or even the less than traditional mother-daughter hunt. Instead for the past few months, these rare moments of down time had become little more than opportunities to mourn what she had lost.

And so Helen paced the halls. Granted she did it in a way she hoped wouldn't be too obvious. After all, she was supposed to be the strong one, the invincible force that helped everyone else feel safe in a surreal environment few sane people would consider "safe". But it was her normal. For years now, walking amidst the frightening, rejected members of society had been her normal. It wasn't enough.

"Magnus…"

Helen turned to the familiar voice of Will Zimmerman calling her from down the hallway. He was clearly out of breath as though he'd run a distance to find her quickly.

"What is it?" Helen asked, almost hoping for a crisis that might divert her imagination.

Will came to a stop inches from her face and made as if to catch his breath.

"You have a visitor," he breathed heavily.

"For that, you sprinted all the way here?" Helen inquired. "It must be a rather imposing visitor."

"You could say that," Will replied, "Tesla is the only vampire I know."

Helen nearly chuckled.

"Well then," she said, "I'll have to expand your circle." Starting to walk with him back to her office where she assumed Nikola was waiting, she asked, "What was so important anyway?"

"I'm not exactly sure," Will admitted. "I didn't push it. All I know is he seemed agitated when I explained it might take me a moment to find you."

"Agitated?"

"Yeah," Will nodded. "Like nails and fangs growing, the vampire deal; that kind of agitated usually sends me running."

Helen turned towards him momentarily to see that her protégé was not teasing, but actually a bit taken aback by her old friend's presentation. She would have to talk with Nikola about this. It wouldn't due for him to be frightening her staff for no good reason. At least she assumed he didn't have a good reason.

"Ah, Nikola," Helen began, having reached her office. "To what do I owe this unexpected pleasure?"

"This is serious, Helen," Nikola replied fiercely. "Come in and have a seat."

Helen raised an eyebrow at his presumptuous command. She wasn't used to being ordered around in her own house and she didn't intend to set a precedent.

"I must have misheard you," she observed pleasantly enough. "I thought you told me to sit down."

By now Nikola was striding across the room towards her literally vibrating with nervous energy, the aura of agitation Will had noted. In a misguided attempt to protect his friend and employer, the young man moved to place himself between Helen and the vampire, eliciting a snarl of anger from Tesla. Helen was quick to fearlessly reverse their positions.

"Will, you may leave," she said gently, "I'll be fine and I can see Nikola isn't in the mood for an audience. Thank you."

Will locked eyes with her briefly as if to question her words, then thought better of it. He left the room without argument.

"Nikola!" Helen exclaimed once Will had departed. "This behavior is inexcusable and I won't have it!"

Startled by the forcefulness of her response, Tesla briefly stopped in his tracks. Nails and fangs retracted and he once more appeared to be the classmate she'd studied with another lifetime ago. Persona in place, he bowed low with the gentlemanly air of respect he felt would soothe her.

"Please accept my apologies for the overly aggressive nature of my approach," he pronounced formally. Tesla didn't miss Helen rolling her eyes at his overly solicitous tone.

"What is it Nikola?" Helen demanded impatiently. "What is so important that you storm in here unannounced and proceed to intimidate my staff?"

"If you must know," Nikola said, "I had a disturbing visit from your old paramour."

"And…"

"He had a rather unconventional proposition for me," the vampire revealed. "It's one that might change your life significantly. I, of course, thought it incumbent upon me to forewarn you of his plan. In fact, were you to protest strongly, I would be forced to reconsider my pledge of assistance. So, as I was saying earlier, please, have a seat Helen."

From Tesla's attitude, Helen could tell John's request had unnerved him. Since it went without saying Nikola was the master of the unconventional, whatever this proposal was must have been extraordinary. Undoubtedly, John was in trouble.

Helen sat down without protest. "Alright, you have my attention. Now what is so important?"

"He still loves you, you know," Tesla stated flatly. "After all these years, you continue to occupy his thoughts. And now he is worried, believes you need something he can't give you."

Helen scrunched up her eyes in an expression of confusion, something she seldom experienced or admitted. Nikola had little doubt his old friend was also growing impatient.

"John has developed a fine interest in my cloning research." As he spoke Tesla watched Helen's face, acutely aware of the signals that passed over her familiar visage. She was not happy to think of John being part of Tesla's scientific projects. Her displeasure contaminated her lovely features with worry.

"Do not worry, Helen," Nikola continued. "John's motives are pure. He seeks a gift for you."

"You believe that will put my mind at ease?" Helen queried testily. "I fear you know me better than that. So exactly what is it John wants to give me that requires your special assistance?"

"Only a new and improved John Druitt," Nikola answered, feigning a certainty of purpose he did not feel. "He wants to create a John Druitt who is the man he once was, before the source blood. When that is done he plans to introduce the two of you and, shall we say, let nature take its course."

She was speechless. Grateful he'd persuaded her to sit, Helen breathed deeply trying to conceal her shock. What was John trying to do? What did he imagine she wanted so badly he'd risk this?

"And you're telling me because…" Helen queried noncommittally.

"As I said before, I think you have a right to know what he's planning, since it will involve you," Tesla replied.

Helen was silent for only a moment before she pressed onward.

"Can you do it? Can you do what he asked?"

"Can I create a clone of John Druitt?" Tesla repeated. "Well of course I can. I'm devastated that you would doubt my ability in the matter."

"And remove the homicidal curse of the source blood?" Helen persisted.

"Yes, I have every confidence I can accomplish that as well."

"Then do it, Nikola," she all but ordered, "but do it for the John we know. Reverse the effect of the source blood, but don't you dare to clone John Druitt. Do you hear me?"

"It's not that simple, my dear. Removing the influence of John's transformation from his clone is, as I said simple, but from the original not so much."

"And if you do clone him, what was the plan for 'the original'."

"John had every intention of terminating his own existence so as not to confuse the situation."

"Confuse the situation! The two of you," Helen exclaimed, "the hubris of the male ego is unfathomable! How dare you proceed with something so unnatural?"

"Unnatural? Really my dear!" Nikola protested indignantly. "I fear this is a case of the pot calling the kettle black as they say. Injecting the source blood as you planned, was that not unnatural?"

"Most certainly it was," Helen avowed without hesitation. "And we have all paid tenfold for my arrogance. But I, for one, have learned from the error of my ways. But you…"

"But I was determined to help old friends," he insisted innocently.

Helen shook her head, unwilling to accept so simple an explanation.

"Then help us, but as I say," she insisted, "do it in a way that will help my John, not some creation of yours."

Helen's use of the words "my John" was not lost on Nikola Tesla. He'd seen the look on her face as he'd described John's plans to end his own life once his clone had taken his place with Helen. She'd been horrified. Deep inside, her life was still inexorably linked with John Druitt's. Perhaps it always would be.

TBC

* * *

A/N: Next chapter, John and Helen talk!

Please let me know you're reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Communication

It hadn't taken much to sway Nikola to her side of the argument. Initially Helen had been surprised. Her old classmate was usually more difficult to persuade once he'd committed himself to a course of action. Then again, his shifting loyalties weren't all that hard to understand.

Helen held no delusions regarding Nikola's narcissistic self interests. He wanted her for himself, always had in spite of her efforts to dissuade him. Helping John in a way that could solidify their relationship was most likely not something he wanted to do. Now she was giving him the perfect out. Even Nikola admitted any attempts to remove the Ripper taint from the original John were unlikely to be successful. Whatever happened, Nikola could claim he'd tried.

But Helen intended to hold him strictly accountable. She planned to watch over every detail of his work. Distasteful as it was for her, perhaps working together they could come up with something she alone had been unable to synthesize. After all, Nikola had unwittingly shocked John back into temporary sanity those many months ago. It was reasonable to suppose there might be a permanent solution given that unpredicted outcome. And if that was the case, perhaps some of the homicidal memories that tortured the man could be removed as well.

It was almost too much to hope for, Helen cautiously reminded herself. She could feel the pounding of her heart as she considered the possibility of having John restored to her. It had been so long since she'd experienced delight when contemplating her future. Yet after Ashley's loss, she didn't want to get her hopes up. There was only so much pain her heart could take. In the past, John Druitt had broken her heart into tiny, nearly irreparable pieces. She was far from sure she was prepared for another go round.

But sure or not, Helen began the delicate dance of finding John. She put out her widely diverse, far flung feelers in an attempt to gauge his location. Since he'd taken off after Dana Whitcomb shortly before Ashley's funeral, he'd been in the wind, at least to her. His meeting with Tesla had been an unexpected aberration. She didn't dare hope he was somewhere close by. Teleportation broke the rules of time and space. He could be anywhere.

OoOoOo

A full week after her discussion with Tesla, Helen Magnus deplaned at Heathrow. At her request, a representative of the London Sanctuary was in the terminal to meet her. It seems Declan had successfully tracked John to an outlying suburb where he'd been the past few weeks following leads on Whitcomb's whereabouts. Declan had given Helen's driver a dossier for her, filled with dire warnings of the changes noted in Druitt by his London trackers. Declan had tried to convince Helen to meet with him first, but true to herself, she'd insisted on being taken directly to John's last known location.

Helen was surprised at her reluctance to read the information Declan supplied. He'd already warned her during their most recent video conference. The head of the restored London sanctuary suspected John of recent random killings in his old stomping grounds. The information she dutifully read detailed John's comings and goings as they were known. Helen supposed John's frustration over being unable to exact his revenge on Dana Whitcomb had spilled over to the innocent. The Ripper had been triggered. Or maybe, just maybe, they were wrong, assuming the worst given John's past actions.

In any case, she would find out soon enough.

As always, she was ready for all eventualities. Though her heart hoped none of her preparation would be necessary, she carried a licensed handgun and a stunner specifically calibrated by Henry with John in mind.

_If he came to Nikola only a few days ago, asking for his help, he can't be that far gone, can he?_

OoOoOo

Before she could knock on the door to John's flat, it opened before her eyes. There was John, much as she'd remembered him from their last encounter after Ashley's death.

"Helen," he began gallantly, "to what do I owe this expected visit?"

He could always throw her off her game. Today was no exception. How had he known she was coming? Her face telegraphed the question.

"It was Declan of course," John supplied. "He fancies himself quite the detective, yet it was so simple to spot his operatives. From there, I knew immediately who wanted to find me."

Helen stood transfixed, taking in his bearing. He seemed himself, focused, well dressed, and formal.

"You needn't worry, Helen, Jack is nowhere to be found today," he avowed. "But where are my manners? Do come in my dear. I assume your trip was long and tedious."

He stood aside and ushered her into the flat, a simply furnished one room affair he'd inhabited less than a week. It was definitely beneath his usual standards.

"I know, I know," John said. "I should have a nicer flat, but I'm not planning on staying."

"So much the better," Helen said, sitting down and making herself at home. "I'm hoping you'll return with me to the Sanctuary."

John Druitt prided himself on being prepared for most any eventuality. But with Helen, he'd seldom succeeded. She could wind her way beneath his defenses and disarm him quicker than a horde of vicious mercenaries.

"I wasn't expecting an invitation," he admitted honestly.

Helen looked away briefly and smiled a small, hesitant smile.

"Anymore than I expected to be issuing one," she countered. "But it seems you and Nikola have struck up a contract of sorts. I need to talk with you about that agreement."

"That does not concern you, Helen," John spat forcefully. "Nikola had no right!"

With that Helen all but jumped to her feet and came to stand inches from Druitt's face.

"He had every right!" Helen insisted. "But you, what right do you have making a decision that would impact my life so severely? Did you even think of discussing it with me?"

For the briefest of moments, John appeared appropriately chastened. Then he struck back.

"On the contrary, I was fully within my rights," he calmly protested. "I was speaking of procedures to be carried out on _my_ body, procedures that could allow me to … to gain redemption of a sort … to make amends. Why would I need to ask your permission?"

In spite of herself, Helen's face softened. If she were to believe him, his misguided journey was an attempt to set things right, a selfless exploit to …

"Because I care," she whispered just loud enough for him to hear, "because I was once an important part of your life."

"And are to this day," John added.

It was no more than a few words he uttered, yet they left her speechless. How had she become so vulnerable to him all over again? Here she was frozen in place, drowning in his eyes, waiting for _his_ next move. She didn't have long to wait.

Leaning forward only slightly, John reached out and wrapped his arms around her. At first, Helen stood stiffly, acutely aware of his proximity and how her entire plan had crumbled around her. Seconds later, her arms came up to encompass John's waist and pull him even closer. She was lost. She still loved this man, in spite of her protestations, in spite of the sensible, rational warnings firing in her sensible, rational brain. She should never have come here alone.

"It's alright, Helen," John crooned softly in her ear, with that tone that always eased her mind. But she couldn't afford the luxury of sentiment right now.

"No, it's not alright," she argued, pulling away just enough to see his face. "I want the John Druitt I know, not some weak imitation. Do you understand me?"

John thought for a moment and then slowly shook his head, a forlorn expression on his face. Then he let go of Helen and walked to the other side of the room.

"I am not the man you knew so very long ago," he said, stating a fact painfully obvious to both of them. "Even if Nikola somehow ensures our friend Jack stays dead and buried, I carry the memories of his atrocities within me. Those memories have changed me forever. I am not the man for you, Helen. There is no way for the man I am to go backward, to undo all of this. But the clone, the clone would have a chance to once more be the man you fell in love with, the one you wanted to marry."

If Helen thought John Druitt's power over her had diminished one iota over the intervening decades, she was sorely mistaken. As tears began to fall, she walked over to stand in front of him once more. Then her right hand came up to gently caress his cheek. He leaned into her touch and was for a brief time once again the man who would risk anything for her happiness.

"What do you want me to do?" Druitt asked, knowing his beloved would have an answer.

"Return to the Sanctuary with me," she said. "I believe working together with Tesla, we may be able to cure you without the desperate measures you have conceived."

He stood silent. He'd expected none of this. Tesla's duplicity, her visit, the strength of her enduring feelings, all of it was unexpected. He'd hoped she still cared for him, in fact that was the reason he'd approached Tesla in the first place, but to hear it from her lips, to see it in her eyes, was more that he anticipated.

"And if you can't?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it, John," Helen replied. "But I don't intend to come to it."

TBC

A/N: Thanks to all for your feedback so far. Reviews greatly appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4 Reality

Chapter 4: Reality

The return trip to Old City was courtesy of John's special ability. As such, it was instantaneous, giving Helen little chance to catch up with herself, and no chance to confer with her colleagues at the London sanctuary. One hour later, she found herself standing in her office, alone.

The past hour had been a whirlwind of activity. No sooner had they arrived in a flash of light, than John demanded she summon Will, Henry and Tesla to join them in her office. Then, John had shared the whole story of his past few weeks in England. It wasn't pretty. In fact, his account was worse than anything Helen could have imagined. It seemed Jack had returned with a vengeance. Only by the most severe exercise of will had John managed to keep Helen safe at his flat. Now, he insisted on being confined in the SHU while the others worked on finding his miracle cure.

It all happened so quickly. With John's cooperation, Henry and Bigfoot had placed him in a secure cell in the SHU, while Helen monitored the process from her office. She couldn't bear to accompany them, but knew she would have to visit their prisoner sooner or later. In spite of everything she'd been through, she was still in shock from what she'd heard only minutes ago.

Declan's dossier hadn't begun to detail Jack's recent crime spree. Helen was horrified when John told her exactly what he'd been up to since last they were together. By his own admission, there were five dead, all perfectly innocent citizens who had the poor fortune of meeting up with one of history's most notorious serial killers. He'd escaped detection by traditional law enforcement much as he had in nineteenth century England. You couldn't track what you couldn't see and John expertly vanished with the best of them!

All of it left Helen with renewed moral conflicts, emotions that had haunted her for decades. John or rather Jack deserved punishment for his cruel, inhuman, criminal actions. She'd known that since the day she'd been prepared to kill him in the back alley of a London slum, even as he took the life of one more hapless woman. From the standpoint of justice, she knew she ought to turn him over to the police, yet she realized that would be a futile effort. On the simplest level, without an EM field to hem him in, he'd simply abscond to carry on his nefarious deeds. At least if she kept him here he'd be contained and with any luck cured. Once that happened, there would be a whole new set of questions she was in no hurry to answer.

OoOoOo

"We missed you at lunch," Will said as he poked his head in through the open door.

Helen looked up from her desk, greeting her protégé with a look of qualified welcome. Silently she motioned for him to come in.

"I know," she said belatedly, "I wasn't hungry."

"I'm surprised you're not in the lab with Tesla."

"Going over some things here before I join up with him," she clarified. "We often see things from different vantage points. I need to be completely clear on mine."

Will nodded silently as he walked around the desk and took a seat. Helen looked up again, realizing he wanted to talk.

"That's what I wanted to see you about," Will said. "Exactly what is your goal in all this? What's going on with you and Druitt?"

She held her tongue, not giving rein to the first thoughts that crossed her mind. She wanted to say this was personal and none of Will and anyone else's business. She was wrong of course. It would, all of it, affect each and every one of them in its own way. It was imperative she remember that one certainty. Her future and most likely the future of the Sanctuary would be impacted by her next decisions. She'd learned that much in the horrifying glimpses of a possible future only a few short months ago.

She owed Will a straightforward answer.

"I still love him," she replied, doing her best to say the words in a strong, fearless voice.

"I'm working with Nikola on a cure for his madness."

"I thought you'd done that before … and failed."

Helen looked at Will sharply, as though she'd been slapped. Yes, she had failed. She knew that all too well. Still something about hearing the words from her protégé stung painfully.

"Yes, my efforts were unsuccessful," she conceded. "I'm hoping that with Nikola's help things will turn out differently."

Will took in her words with more than a little skepticism.

"He's the Ripper, you know," Will said flatly. "And from Declan's report he's been killing again."

"I know," Helen replied. "I know better than anyone what John is."

It was Will's turn to wince. Not so much at his employer's words but her accusatory tone. He'd hurt her. He hadn't meant to, but he was afraid her lack of objectivity could risk everything she'd built up over the years in her effort to save John Druitt. More than once she'd charged him to be her "moral compass" and that's exactly what he intended to do. Hard as it was, he'd have to be the one to tell her the truths she might not want to hear.

Will sat down on the opposite side of the desk. Reluctant to break the tense silence between them for fear of what might follow, he held his tongue, pondering what best to say.

"What if this goes wrong?" Will finally queried without finesse. "What if this serum you and Nikola concoct doesn't cure him? What then? How long will you keep trying. How long will you keep … him … here?"

"I don't know the answers to all those questions yet," she admitted, her proud voice softened. "But you should know by now, I'd never do anything to jeopardize the Sanctuary."

Will nodded appreciatively. He owed Magnus that much at least. Trust in her instincts and her loyalties. At the same time he suspected how much Druitt meant to her, maybe more than she realized herself.

"I do know," Will confirmed. "It's just … well, you know … your relationship with Druitt …"

Helen took pity on Will and rescued him from the quicksand rapidly consuming him.

"He was Ashley's father, the love of my life," she confirmed. "Yes, I know. That's why I'll depend on you to keep me rational about all of this, my moral compass, as you said." While speaking, Helen realized anew how difficult all of this would be to navigate. So much could go wrong. John was on a downward spiral and there was no way of telling how quickly he would fully devolve, leaving behind nothing more than Jack.

"I intend to do all I can for John," Helen continued. "If it doesn't work, that will be the end of it."

Despite her definitive tone, Will suspected Helen wouldn't be able to bring herself to give up on Druitt. Still, he'd see her through this.

"So what's next," he asked.

OoOoOo

He'd been in the SHU less than twenty-four hours. In less than a quarter of that time John Druitt had tired of his new role as prisoner and test subject. "Bigfoot" or Nikola himself had been in all too frequently to draw blood samples. Bigfoot had been back with meals on two occasions. Other Sanctuary personnel had stood outside his enclosure on occasion, much as one would observe a caged animal, at least that's how Druitt saw it.

But there had been no visits from the one person he'd wanted to see, Helen. He'd placed himself in this position for her, yet she was nowhere to be found. He told himself she was busy in the lab, doing her best to develop whatever serum would finally deliver him from the nightmare even now claiming his soul once again. But what if she had given up on him, what if what she'd said in London had simply been a ploy to imprison him? She was, after all, the only one left in this world who had the power to bend him to her will, the only one who could make him as vulnerable as he now was.

Before John could pursue this depressing train of thought any further, he looked up to see Helen hovering just outside his enclosure. She looked beautiful as always, her now dark hair hanging loosely around her shoulders, incongruously contrasting with the sterile white of her lab coat. Separated from him by the glass barrier and the EM field, she seemed and literally was, unreachable. He groaned inwardly at the thought that she'd always been exactly that, unreachable in so many ways. It was ironic, but he was after all, the king of irony.

"Hello, John," she said as she breached the confinement space, immediately resetting the EM field.

"What, no guard to protect you? I was certain you'd at least have Tesla with you, fangs at the ready."

Helen stood silently, directly in front of him. She regarded him carefully, endeavoring to decipher his true meaning and his present state of sanity. It was a task easier said than done, she remembered. He had fooled her before and she feared he could and would do it again.

"No, no guard, John," Helen replied. "But I am ready to defend myself if necessary. It won't be necessary, will it?"

He tipped the smallest of smirks in her direction then turned away. Unable to meet her eyes for his shame, he said, "No, it won't be necessary." And in silence he prayed he spoke the truth.

"I'm glad you came," he admitted after a moment's silence. "I'd begun to worry you'd given up already."

Helen walked around to face him. She stood solemnly then bowed and shook her head deliberately.

With a tentative smile, she protested, "You should know me better than that. It will take much more than initial frustration to dissuade me from a course of action."

"Ah, that's my Helen," John said, "stubborn to a fault."

She shot him a warning look.

He held up his hands in a look of surrender.

"Not a criticism, my dear," he protested, "simply an observation and one I hope will stand me in good stead. By the way, how are you and Nikola faring?"

"I won't lie to you John, this may be more difficult than I'd hoped, particularly given your current state. We'll have to be patient."

"You'll excuse me if I'm not overly patient given my current accommodations," John stated frankly. His tone was pleasant enough, yet Helen knew she shouldn't let her guard down entirely.

"You know very well why you're in the SHU," Helen countered. Then she softened, "Still I'm sure we could make it more comfortable. I'll have Henry see to it."

"Actually, more visits from a certain charming lady would help greatly," he said.

"I'm sure that could be arranged," Helen replied. In spite of her best intentions, she would never be completely immune to John's charms. She would have to be on her guard, every minute she was with him. Of that much she had no doubt.

TBC

* * *

A/N: I just finished reading a brilliant piece called Starting Over Backwards by DramaLexy.

It's a wonderful tale of John and Helen's reunion. I encourage you to check it out.

Reading it, I decided to have this much shorter piece turn out differently, thus the angst.

Most likely two more chapters to complete this one; sorry it's taken so long. Real life has a way of interfering.


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